How do you "consumate" a marriage like that? Are conjugal visits really allowed to criminals?
And if you cannot consumate the marriage, why bother getting married?
i guess because there are so few brothers in the congregations, sisters start writing to brothers that are in prison.
in prison, these ne'er do wells have no bills, no job to commute to, 3 meals, a bed, free medical insurance and loads of time to read the bible and the wts publications.
oh my, kinda like bethel.
How do you "consumate" a marriage like that? Are conjugal visits really allowed to criminals?
And if you cannot consumate the marriage, why bother getting married?
i would say it would be the catholic cause you can do just about any dam thing you want.
and if you feel like you need to be close to god or something you can always go light some candles and wear a cross or put on a pointed hat or a white collar or deprive yourself of women or men in the case of nuns.
and you get to hear funny boys sing chants, and you also can put some real holly water on your head that the priest got from the sink oh and you can wear saint christopher's.
worshipping those GREEK & ROMAN GODS sounds like so much fun....
so i'm in school, and make a crack about my fanatic parents.
i've made other little comments to this lady before, but this time she stopped, looked at me and said: "what religion did you belong to?
" i told her the jws.
Be honest about it....you really can't make this stuff up ( its hard enough for people to believe the mind control)
while i have seen on many occasions the benefit of sharing our past problems, or life, with others who have been through the same.
i am very curious as to what the real benefit would be, to leaving a religion of such control and segregated thinking, only to venture online or in person to others who are basically a lost congregation of the religion.
does it benefit a person to seek out former jehovah's witnesses?
Hi spiritwalker,
Welcome to this forum!
It is a wonderful support network of people who have all left ( or are in the process) the WTBTS. There are others here who, for whatever reasons, are still active in the faith, but are disallusioned. Whatever, it is a forum of rational, caring people who all understand how difficult it is to cope with and survive " Life after JW land". I left 20 odd years ago and understand that it is a "challenge" to adjust to life on the outside. Make as many new friends as you can, and if yu feel the need, see a therapist, to help you sort through the feelings of abandonement and depression. You can build a satisfying life for yourself on the outside, without having to worry about " demons possssing you".
As was mentioned in previous posts, we learn on the outside that our life will be what we make of it. Keep a positive mental attitude, and keep smiling... this board is a source of camaraderie to me, even after 20 years of being outside the "truth". Keep checking in and post when you feel comfortable enough to do so. Best of luck to you.. and welcome aboard !!!
regards, Frank
"Watchtower Theocratic Party Poopers"... to be specific
i have not posted in several months..........way too much emotionally for me to deal with everything, since my family is all "in the truth" and i am the black sheep
well here is my dilemma.........we are going to celebrate halloween with the kids on friday
there are several in the congregation who still call me to do their hair.........i don't want to do it anymore, but don't know how to tell them as many of them are elderly and i love them dearly.......i don't want to hurt them, ya know?
Hi Redneckgirl,
Hang in there....
I went through it 20 years ago. I understand; it is hard. In my experience, I did not say anything to anyone; ( no excuses) I just stopped attending meetings, service, social appointments. I took the first move, and they get the hint.. There is no need to answer any questions, and if the Elders try to say that you have to attend a meeting ( Judicial or otherwise) that they have called on your behalf, you just do not attend. If they call at your door , you politely say it is a bad time--"goodbye" ( close door). The answer is that you do DO NOT acknowledge their play for power over you. They can only cause us harm and distress if we Empower them to do so. ( THEY really do think that they are representatives of God!!!) Think of it as taking out their batteries , as in one of those annoying child talkiing toys that just will not "shut up" and is triggered by your just walking passed it.... so you disable it by taking out the battery.
You are fortunate that you have a spouse who understands, and children, which in this instance will be a welcome distraction. As for the "parents" and extended family, you can tell them the honest truth " I do not believe this anymore" . End of story. I always maintained a " high road" attitude with my JW family, and would not let them harrass me or get me down. I was always polite, firm and consistant in my resolve to be free of that religion and the teachings I was raised with. I eventually won, because they all fell away also. The others will not accept any explanation, because we know how they are taught to respond. There is no reasoning with them.
This is all very hard to work through, and is a bumpy road. In my experiences, many good "worldly" friends helped me work through this, along with a good therapist. When our entire support network of friends is all JW, it makes it that much harder, unless you have a circle of friends on the outside. Good luck, my thoughts are with you on this one ( all positive thoughts!!). And I am sure everyone in this forum will give you the needed encouragement and bravery to see this through.
regards
Frank
.
sincerely,.
district overbeer of the "tricks & treats" class
Trick or Treat, Valis
....ps your moniker picture looks like it hurts..
as jws what did you understand the term "discreet" to mean ?
I like "sad elders" definition the best.
i went to a jw funeral last night.
i haven't been to the hall, or any gathering of the dubs in 2 years...and ordinarily, i wouldn't have gone, but this man meant a lot to me as a child.
i walked in, and it was like another world.
Hey, asortoffairytale,
I know exactly what you mean. I have lived thru it for the passed 20 years. I have come to the conclusion that their rude treatment is THEIR CHOICE , not mine. I can live with myself. I am always polite and courteous to them and firmly tell them, " I am not interested, but you are always welcome at my home socially". I can say that, because I know that they will not come. As for your girlfriend, by all means, let her " clear her conscience" and blast them when they come....it might make her feel better....it might also be fun to watch (LOL)
As for funerals, I was raised in the faith and left in my early 20s ( back in the early 1980s) my dad was an elder. He and my mother eventually fell away. My dad passed on this spring and while he had no lack of friends ( "worldly" that is) I called the current PO in our former congregation whom I knew and told him that there might be some people who would want to know of my dads passing. My parents were very social as JWs, and had many friends---always someone at our house for dinners. NO ONE came to his service, much less called my mother to offer condolences. NOT ONE PERSON. 20 years is a long time to heal, but the JWs have a callous nature. They are conditioned and taught to be that way. Who needs those kind of people in life? I have come to the conclusion , based on my "worldly experiences" of the passed 20 years, that I am much better off without them.
regards, Frank
.
flowerpetals post and thread reminded me of some of the scams we would use to try to show the maximum numbers of hours spent in "service" for the smallest amount of effort.
here's some of the ones i remember...just wondered if any of you had any other memories.. .
As a full time pioneer for many years, we had it all figured out...sometimes we would stand at the commuter railroads for several hours and pass out magazines. We would witness at restaurants through lunch and count the time, We would witness to anyone who would listen to count time. Other times when we felt lazy we would take out the territories which inluded all the big estate neighborhoods ( Long Island is full of them) where you cannot park the car and walk, you must drive the car to each house because the distances are so fare. You wasted much time. It exposed me to a lot of fantastic types of architecture which ultimately gave me a direction in life--so in that sense my door to door activities payed off! Now, I go door to door with my children for Boy Scouts and Girl Scout cookies! The JW training came in handy , yet again!!! No "time counted" in this go round, and I am far more commited to my childrens goal.
Frank